Before we get to the low self-esteem therapy exercises for men, let’s quickly examine how most men develop low self-esteem.
How Low Self-Esteem Develops in Men
Low self-esteem typically develops in men during the age of puberty. This is the age when boys start gaining interest in girls and crave their affection.
If girls aren’t showing much interest in us as boys, we usually develop lower self-esteem and start having negative thoughts about ourselves and body image.
The negative thoughts begin to repeat themselves daily, monthly, and yearly until we essentially become our thoughts. This allows no space to show any confidence, let alone, seduce women.
Be that confident guy you imagine when you get ready for bed at night. You can be that guy you “wish” you were.
These low self-esteem therapy exercises will help you reprogram your brain to change that negative thought loop and build unbreakable confidence within yourself.
Take The Negative Self-Thoughts Quiz
If you’re not sure if you suffer from negative thoughts or low self-esteem, you can take this short quiz for a little more insight.
Take the Negative Thought Quiz!
Low self-esteem therapy activities
There is no chronological order to do perform these activities to build confidence, but they are essential to overcome low self-esteem.
- Pay attention to your desires
- Upgrade your diet
- Improve your hygiene
- Dress in a style that makes you feel most confident
- Make a vision board or download a vision board app
- Set smaller goals you can achieve
- Do something nice for yourself
All of us have three parts: our body, our soul and our mind. If you want to live a happy life you have to care for all three of them. Make it a habit of only doing what you want to do. If you want to help someone, help them, if not, don’t feel pressured into saying yes. It’s difficult at first, but you have to put yourself first. It sounds selfish, but many people spend a lot of time doing things they don’t want to do because they felt pressured into it.
Just like flying, you have to help yourself before you can help anyone else.
Adopt a diet or weight loss program, immediately. Start nurturing your body with healthier foods. They will have a positive effect on your physical fitness, as well as mental health without too much extra work. Eat more fruits and vegetables, nuts, cereals, and entire grain products. Buy a small electric grill so you can cook most of your food. I guarantee you’ll see a huge change in your body if you cut back on the fast food.
Hygiene is important for feeling at ease in your personal skin. We’re creatures of habit and sometimes we slack on this critical factor of our life. Make it a habit of taking care of your personal hygiene every day.
Take a shower every morning. Buy a razor or electric razor to keep your facial hair well groomed. Buy an iron so your clothes are well pressed. The feeling of clean and neat gives a great boost to your confidence.
Stay away from baggy clothes in favor of clothes that fit well. Also, don’t dress in only one color. Get a good mix of bright colors and darker colors. Get something unique that fits you well even if you have to pay a little bit more. One outfit every month builds up after a year.
Many people lose their self-esteem after they neglect their hopes, aspirations, and talents – or when they allow others to eclipse them with hurtful remarks. One specific exercise to sincerely remind you what a valuable man you are, is making a vision board, and hanging it on a wall of your bedroom.
Take a big poster board and a set of magazines to use, and then browse their pages to find images that represent yourself, your abilities, and aspirations.
If you’re not big into art projects, just download a vision board app. These allow you to create a vision board on your phone so you can always look at it and update it.
This will keep you focused on a daily basis so you; do not forget who you are, and what you are able to accomplish. No longer will you listen to what others say you’re capable of.
One of the most common causes of low self-esteem is the incapability to attain your dreams. Frequently, the desires you have aren’t personal enough for you, consequently, they are a chore to try to complete. So it is no surprise when you fail to reach those goals.
As an example, make exercise a part of your day-to-day routine. It will now be your goal to find 10-20 mins this afternoon for a chunk of fitness or yoga, and you will actually feel better about yourself by the end of the day.
Remember, small goals add up to big results.
While your self-esteem is low, you generally tend to think that you do not deserve something good. For that reason, you never allow yourself to enjoy life to the fullest, and you never do anything good for yourself.
If you want to update your fashion and see a cool shirt, then go ahead and buy yourself that nice shirt or shoes you have got constantly dreamed of. Doing something good for yourself will make you feel better about who you are, that allows you to certainly enhance your self-esteem.
Don’t become a shopaholic, but sometimes get something for yourself. You deserve something good.
This boosts your mood and you start feeling like a different person when you wear your new shirt or use the new gadget you bought.
Don’t rely on expensive things to be confident, but self- confidence is a must if you really want success in life.
How to work on self-esteem
Though there are various ways to build confidence, these seven steps are the best path to high self–esteem:
- Become mindful
- Change your story or frame
- Stop comparing
- Find your inner star
- Remember that you are not your circumstances
We can’t change anything if we don’t understand what needs to be changed. Simply becoming aware of our constant negative self-talk, we start to distance ourselves from the feelings it brings up. This helps us to become aware of them and make them positive. It is important for us to have positive self-talk to become more confident in our daily lives.
Some circles call this a frame, but essentially, all of us have a story we have created for ourselves that shapes our self-perceptions, upon which our self-esteem is totally based.
If we want to change that story, we must recognize where it came from and from where we obtained the ideas we tell to ourselves. Sometimes negative thoughts come to mind like you are lazy, you are fat or something else and we start believing in them.
Instead, think you are a very smart person, you are getting into shape, and the positive of any negative thought you have. You don’t have to be perfect today because you are a work in progress. Always think of yourself as getting better every day.
You will be successful, you’re just making your way down the path.
We have to avoid comparing ourselves with others. I emphasize that simply due to the fact that a person seems happy on social media doesn’t mean they are happy in real life. Comparisons lead to negative self-talk, which leads to tension and stress.
The thoughts of low self-esteem compared to this person can badly influence your self-esteem as well as other areas in your life, which include work, relationships, etc.
Remember, they’re taking a picture. You don’t know what stress they face on a daily basis and obviously, they hide that part of their life from social media.
Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, the only thing is to discover your strengths and work on them. Someone may be a wonderful musician, but a terrible cook. Neither activity completely defines their self-worth, but having a skill that makes you feel confident helps in all areas of your life.
Recognize what your strengths are and the emotions of self-belief they bring, especially in times of doubt.
It’s easy to make generalizations when you “mess up” or “fail” at something, but making yourself aware of your strengths will give you a more realistic perspective of yourself.
Ton and tons of research prove that there is a correlation between workout and self-esteem, in addition, to improving mental health. Regular exercise is a must, no way around it.
Is there is someone in your life you haven’t forgiven? An ex-girlfriend? A member of the family? Yourself? By way of holding on to feelings of bitterness or resentment, we hold ourselves stuck in a cycle of negativity.
If we haven’t forgiven ourselves, the disgrace will keep us in this negative loop.
You can forgive others, but still not like them. Just don’t give them space in your mind.
Ultimately, learning to differentiate between your situations and who you’re is key to self -esteem. We’re all born with endless capabilities and equal worth as human beings.
If you think less, then that’s a fake perception that you learned through the years. Consequently, with tough work and self-compassion, negative thoughts and beliefs can be unlearned.
Taking the steps outlined above is the groundwork to increase your self-esteem.
Tips on self-love – the mantra of a healthy life
There are various emotional needs which a person wants to fulfill in his life. Self-love means to meet the needs and wants you have set for yourself.
It is well said that it is each and every man’s duty to know about himself and become his own parent. Though life is full of times where you need love, affection, touch, and encouragement from others. You want to put most of your work towards self-love, because the more you love yourself, the better you will feel.
It’s somewhat of a self-therapy for yourself so you don’t have to rely on the validation of others. You have and value your own validation.
This self-validation is unbreakable because you know nobody in this world cares more about you than yourself. The following tips can lead a person to live a happy and peaceful life.
Follow these tips to master your emotions think on a higher level:
- Recognize your feelings
- Give respect to your feelings
- Write the cause
- Satisfy your desires
- Express your thoughts
- Put yourself in comfort
- Find new pleasures
- Give advice to yourself
- Love yourself
It’s very important to acknowledge your inner instincts. Try to think about your thoughts. Do they depict a kind of worry, despair, envy, hurt or any other kind of negative feeling?
Try to notice your moods and how you feel with an outside perspective. Whether you are irritated, happy or anxious, try to recognize those feelings. Make it a point to examine them several times and really think about those feelings like a shrink with no bias or judgment.
Whenever you feel an uncomfortable kind of feeling, it could be sadness, anger, etc. The first thing you should do is accept the feeling, examine the feeling, and take deep breaths until it goes away.
Take a pen and paper and write the exact reason for the feeling. You don’t have to do this for every feeling, but you should try for as many as possible.
The moment you identify what you really desire, brainstorm ways about how you can fulfill this need. It will give you life clarity and determination to reach your dreams.
True self-expression makes you feel completely relaxed. Once you recognize you are anxious, you can start practicing meditation or a simple yoga exercise which can put your mind at ease.
Start doing some of the breathing exercises which can make your nervousness become more calm and relaxed. If you are angry, go for some more intense physical activity, which can release your thoughts.
Try to make yourself feel comfortable by taking a warm shower or write an appreciation letter to yourself (harder than you think). This will make you feel good and relaxed.
Do whatever you like or things you haven’t tried such as a walk in nature, dancing, or some new place. It will basically release chemicals which erase the stress, pain, and negativity from your mind.
Always give yourself advice, but don’t be overly critical. During hard times encouraging yourself can do wonders, so it’s very important to be your own positive coach. Keep reminding yourself that you’re trying your best and that makes you proud.
Think about coaches in sports. They don’t say, “You suck kid!” They say, “It’s ok you’ll get it next time.” Or, “Try to improve on this.”
Every individual should love themselves as it not only brings positive thoughts but also creates positive energy to face the challenges of life.
Follow these tips to keep yourself rejuvenated and keep rising in life. Self Love gives you an inner satisfaction to the person and provides peace. Self- love is what everyone should have to rise emotionally and practically in life.
Keys to Positive Self Esteem
Self-esteem means the respect you give to yourself. This internet era we are living in, where the people are image conscious, and looking for any way to stand out in a material driven society, there are more chances of low esteem.
As stated earlier, low self-esteem is a result of many of the same negative thoughts repeated over a long period of time. Low self-esteem means that a person has developed negative habits in their thoughts, behavior, and communication.
Through consistent practice, you can learn how to convert your low self-esteem to high-quality confidence. It’s easy and simple to practice but, the only thing required is determination and focus to grow.
- Stay away from Generalization
- Conquer Your Low Self-Esteem
- Examine your Negative Thoughts as an Observer
I commonly get messages from guys saying “But, I have low self- esteem, I can’t be that bold.” I remind them, if they’re actively working to improve themselves, then they have something to be confident about.
Just like you reading this article, you have the desire to grow and think on a higher level. You also want to realize your full potential and what you can do.
Most people reside somewhere in the middle between high and low esteem. But, never say you have low self-esteem because it starts the negative thought loop.
If you think that you have low self-esteem then the problem for you seems to be very big and you start feeling like you can’t fix it.
Instead, you must conquer this thought and replace it with a positive thought loop or positive affirmation. Check out positive affirmation playlists on Spotify or anywhere online to reprogram your thought loops.
It is very important for a person to empower the different aspects of life where you feel that you lack confidence; it could be anything like your weight or your ability to say it openly.
For example, if you have some personality issues, you should identify it and improve on it.
Be sure to examine yourself from an external perspective. As a doctor and the patient.
In order to increase low self-esteem, it’s important to watch the thought patterns that disrupt self–worth as an unattached person. When you spend years thinking you have low self-esteem, then by default this thought becomes a bias in your subconscious mind that can be broken by only you.
You should keep observing yourself as it leads to more awareness. It makes you stronger and more intellectual.
High self-esteem helps you overcome many the problems in life, not only seduction. It is the reflection of your personality that tells you how to think, act, and how to feel. You become your thoughts.
Confidence will take any man to the next level of clarity, making his life easy and understandable. So, always try to keep high self-esteem by eliminating all the negative thoughts that pass through your mind. One thought at a time.